The Harem Night

Finally! I can say that I've done something interesting after toiling hours, days, weeks on books and homeworks. We've got invited to a Jordanian wedding! Oooh yes, that means shopping time - so "Hey Big Spender, spend your money on me laaa" I begged, he agreed eventhough that's against all his principles - namely,

1. To shop for something I'm most likely to wear only ONCE.
2. To PAY for it - because it's most likely going to be in the few hundreds zone.
3. And to COME with me during the shopping trip.
(He also couldn't understand why I'm so afraid to buy a dress that I like in case someone else showed up in the same one)

This is Cinderella night baby, and no, I'm not going to wear any black abaya or hejab for that matter. I've got my own golden ticket to the wedding hall and I'm gonna groove y'all. I don't know anyone there, but I'm hoping Habibi's colleagues' wives will be there - I've met them only once like... a year ago. But I've made up my mind to go anyway. I can't miss this chance, even if it means sitting at a table by myself.

Shopping was agonizing, I can't seem to find anything I like or if there was something, it wasn't in my size *cough*. I wish I actually sewn myself a dress, but first I have to know how to sew? So that wasn't going to work either. We went home after 3 hours of searching, dissapointed, but I remembered vaguely there was something hanging in my wardrobe that stood out and untouched because it was a kaftan like-3/4 length top, hot pink, flowery, sequinned and see-through - all the reasons why it was left there and completely ignored. (99% of what's in my wardrobe are earth tones to dark coloured clothes). I bought that piece 2 years ago for my cousin's wedding, to wear over a long-sleeve non-see-through long dress. That'll work I thought, with a nice white sleeveless lacey tank top and white pants - I worked out the outfit! Say who???

Make-up all by myself was another torture in itself, because, my equipments must have expired, and truthfully, I really can't paint. My color palettes must have been one I bought for my daughter from Watson's last summer in Malaysia. I only had a mac blush and lipstick - and they are natural tones, so natural make up look was the look for me. Anyway who needs make-up if you have exotic looks huh? :P

We got binti to bed, ibni on his favourite cartoon (emergency technique) and left him with the maid. At the doorstep, I realised I don't have matching shoes. I don't know that many people who has shoes that matches a pink outfit! Nope, no stilettos either. I have only one pair with a pointy end and considerably elavated - and its brown. Ok, obviously I haven't thought about this. Say who cares???

It was about 9pm when we reached the venue. It was really less than 10mins drive from our place. In the car, I'm not sure I should step out and had this Dr. Phil moment with my habibi and needed to talk about my feelings, tra la la.. Habibi shooed me out of the car and I found myself in the entrance with my phone confiscated (until after the party), my handbag checked and I chucked away my abaya, hejab and niqaab for the fashion Exposé.

I walked in to a roomful of very beautiful, heeled, well dressed arab women strutting their looks and moves on the red carpet which was in between the dining tables/chairs on each side of the hall. This is a jaw-dropping scene that I may not be able to fully express in words. I sat at a table where there was no one, and just observed the party accompanied by Arabian Kahwa (coffee) and Shaii (tea). Silky pink, Sapphire blue, Royal yellow, Emerald green, glitters, sequins, the elegant black numbers were all part of the scene. Bad hair days shouldn't exist here but unfortunately mine was suffering from that last night. The amount of CFC's in this room alone should speed up global warming by at least a century. And the make up on one person's face should be my supply for a year at least. Having said that, I must admit that arab women are really drop-dead gorgeous. Mashaallah.

I gawked and hope the jaw-dropping wasn't obvious and enjoyed the blasting arabic music that was swaying the ladies in the right ways. I really can't tell if the arab women were elegantly demure or tough and brash last night. They either make smooth, gentle movements or jumpy syncronized ones that sometimes appear robotic. By this time, some of husband's colleagues' wives came and they sat at my table. Soon, we got in the mood and started dancing too - and I went all out on Shakira's "Forever" as it was the only song in english and one that I recognized. Oooo I felt sweat coming out on my forehead and it was all good, baby! While the CFC's on the arab women's hair helped them maintain their classy evening look and bounced obediently as per needed, mine was going static all over the place.

Once in awhile, I'll go to the reception to get my handphone just to see how Habibi is doing. Apparently on his side, the music was coming out literally from a car's stereo system! On our side, early in the evening, they played some video slides of the couple from the stage, and soon, I was told that the groom will come to our side of the hall. I was frantic at this point because I don't understand how is it a man can come into his hall while we are all 'uncovered'. The lights were dimmed and I thought..."Oh, that's how they do it", but no. The next scene I was going to experience reminded me of the couple in that America's Got Talent show, the Quick Change couple? In just a few seconds playing by ear, the room was filled with abaya-clad women covered from head to toe. I was impressed. So this is how they do it.

The bride was dressed in a stunning (ok, this is subjective, i really didn't like it) strapless white ballroom bridal dress and the groom in his tuxedo. They made their way to the altar for rings exchange ceremony, some dancing on stage and later the groom exited to greet his male guests. My next question need no answer, the male guests will not be seeing the bride at all. And that make sense, why should another man check out out his beautiful new wife?!

Ballroom gowns revealed again soon after the groom left and now the wife is left to party on her own with her family, relatives and friends around her. What I didn't understand though was why there was a camera women taking videos of the bride dancing surrounded by femme fatales of the night. Obviously she (the bride) will be watching the video with her husband? Or other relatives? I wasn't the only one uncomfortable with that, because everytime the video points to our direction, we would duck or cover our faces with the abayas.

It was already past eleven when I called habibi again and found him having dinner already while we were served with a glass of juice. I thought when the men is done, our dinner would arrive. At around 12am, quick change sequel again when groom and relatives of the bride came into the hall. They took photos on stage, showed off the wedding jewelleries presented to the bride by the groom's mom...the photo taking, dancing on stage was becoming indulgent to me by now because I was practically starving at a wedding. Im only saying that because I came from an Asian society where food was a big deal at any weddings. It is the highlight that is as important as the bride and groom's costumes itself. I know some weddings I went to where I only had to eat and didn't even get to see the couple. So did somebody forgot about the guests or whaaaaat? At 12.30am, I concluded that femme fatales don't eat, and called my habibi again to leave.

After all my effort dressing up (fortunately did not spend a cent!), I get a shawarma for dinner.

How's that for my first wedding in Saudi Arabia?

:)

I finally did it. Let me introduce...

My hejab site.

http://ilovehejab.multiply.com

After a long procastination period (see blog entry dated April 2007), I decided to launch my site anyways, using a simple website to host it. A modest no frills site where I put up collections of stories and poems by sisters from all over the world (web) about hejab. My initial idea was just to have a place to collect these stories and poems to motivate non-hejabi muslimahs to go ahead and make that step towards Allah. I wanted to do it on my own site, but after years, I did not find anyone to help me put up the site with the designs that I already have, so today, Alhamdulillah, I decided to just put it up on multiply as it is so accessible to everyone, without having to be a member.

The stories (ROLE MODELS : BLOG STORIES) are those I personally find motivating and informative, while at the same time brings out humility and gratefulness to Allah s.w.t. The first story that I have posted is the one written by Yvonne Ridley, the feminist British journalist who was captured by Taleban years ago, and then became muslim and embraced hejab whole heartedly.

I've also uploaded quite a few poems (POEM COLLECTION) that I've collected over the years on hejab and have given the writers their credits unless its found to be anonymous.

Of course, there is also a FACT FILE listings (links) of various other sites that has information on Hejab, hadeeths, quranic verse pertaining to hejab, etc etc.

I'm also eager to receive submissions of Hejabi stories - from those who have been wearing hejab their whole life, or became a hejabi later in life. Hejabi, Niqaabi, all are welcome to send in their stories or poems. Please send your submissions to ilovehejab@gmail.com. To those who have not yet take the big step and has questions, feel free to email too. Inshaallah there will be an FAQ section that I'd add on later.

I look forward to hear from you.

Wassalam
Ruby@I love hejab

Just the beginning...

I'm one of the guilty FB users who have abandoned Blogspot for a more laid back interactive tool. And no, I haven't been blogging or else it would have been printed here already.

I missed it tho. I believe blogging had somehow sorted out my life in a strange cant-put-my-finger-on it way. All my rants and journey earlier (blogging days) was a documentary of the path I was taking, weighing the routes I wish to take, and finally reaching the destination. There is something I have forgotten to do though. I forgot to think about what to do when I reached the destination. How can I forget my breathlessness, my silent shock when news that I was going to move here (KSA) was told to me in a hospital room where both my kids were admitted for some virus infection? It was an awkward place or situation to celebrate, yet too good a news to just let pass. I cried, yes, I remembered. I cried on my habibi's shoulder and praising Him for answering our prayers.

A year had passed...and life has changed in such big ways for all of us. When He wants to give, He can give beyond any imagination. ALHAMDULILLAHI RABBIL ALAMEEN. I already knew long ago that He answers prayers, and I know for certain, the prayers will be answered in time - when the time is right. And He knows better. ALLAHUL AZEEEM.

The time has come to set new priorities, new objectives or set the bar higher. I'm not quite sure what it is right now. But I know, there is a calling to do more. It's only the least I can do for all the blessings he has bestowed on us. Before I could even think of any, got to straightened out the daily rituals, persevere in the difficulties I'm facing while learning, be patient with things that don't work out, be ikhlas in friendship...

I pray I will find out what the calling is soon...

I pray that I will be better, not worst

I pray that I live as a believing Muslim, and die as a believing Muslim

I pray that my children be protected from harm always

I pray for my husband's safety when he travels for work

I pray for all our success

I pray I won't forget to pray